Then, before we know it, our opinions (rules of the game of life) begin to influence our agreements. But what if you have a conversation with someone who has a different view of the world than yours? This can disrupt any kind of understanding we are trying to forge. Interruption, discernment, disagreements and emotions are now in the driver`s seat, and our focus is primarily on maintaining our own agreements that we have already made with the world. Our lives are animated by the multitude of agreements we make every day. Staying the course with our agreements means applying these good practices in a consistent manner. The alternative is disastrous and costly. Believe me, I`ve seen it. The reward of an organization that practices active listening and speaking around chords is very lively. A team synchronized with all members is a team capable of working with optimal strength. Communication breakdowns in agreements are so frequent that one would expect it. I do not think it is due to an erroneous attempt to understand or be understood. Most people desperately want to be understood even more than they want to agree.
Second, agree: the ultimate part of showing someone you`ve listened to and fully understood the expectations is your action. If you respect the agreements, you cement not only as a good communicator, but also as a person of integrity who keeps his word. And that`s how it`s about not getting their points with the speakers, and the listeners don`t get the information they want. From these discussions put on, equally well-drafted agreements and, before we knew it, we prepared ourselves for some epic misunderstandings. First, as a speaker, ask your listeners, ”What have you heard” or ”What are you going to do with this conversation?” When an agreement is reached, you ask, ”Who is going to do what until when?” Another way to ask is ”what steps are you going to take as a result of this meeting?” If you feel discomfort or tension, you give your listeners permission to give honest feedback. You might also ask, ”Is there anything you want to tell me that I don`t want to hear?” or ”Are there elephants in the room that we need to talk about?” These agreements between us and the world are so entrenched in us that most of the time we do not even see them as agreements. They are implicit, unwritten and uncommune communiqued, but also quite rigid.